Horoscope – Week Beginning March 11

Tuesday, March 10, 2015

Lydia Hearst

If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.


Horoscopes by Rob Brezsny


PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In the fairy tale “The Ugly Duckling,” the
young hero suffers from a peculiar case of mistaken identity. He believes
that he is a duck. All of his problems stem from this erroneous idea. By
duck standards, he is a homely mess. He gets taunted and abused by
other animals, goes into exile, and endures terrible loneliness. In the end,
though, his anguish dissolves when he finally realizes that he is in fact a
swan. United with his true nature, he no longer compares himself to an
inappropriate ideal. Fellow swans welcome him into their community, and
he flies away with them. Is there anything in this story that resonates
with you, Pisces? I’m guessing there is. It’s high time to free yourself from
false notions about who you really are.
ARIES (March 21-April 19): In the old Superman comics, Mister Mxyztplk
was a fiendish imp whose home was in the fifth dimension. He sometimes
sneaked over into our world to bedevil the Man of Steel with pranks.
There was one sure way he could be instantly banished back to his own
realm for a long time: If Superman fooled him into saying his own name
backwards. You might think it would be hard to trick a magic rascal into
saying “Klptzyxm” when he knew very well what the consequences would
be, but Superman usually succeeded. I’d like to suggest that you have a
similar power to get rid of a bugaboo that has been bothering you, Aries.
Don’t underestimate your ability to outsmart the pest.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In 1637, mathematician Pierre de Fermat
declared that he had solved the “Last Theorem,” a particularly knotty
mathematical problem. Unfortunately, he never actually provided the
proof that he had done so. The mystery remained. Other math experts
toiled for centuries looking for the answer. It wasn’t until 1994, more
than 350 years later, that anyone succeeded. I think you are on the verge
of discovering a possible solution to one of your own long-running riddles,
Taurus. It may take a few more weeks, but you’re almost there. Can you
sense that twinkle in your third eye? Keep the faith.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Your upcoming efforts might not be flawless in
all respects, but I suspect you will triumph anyway. You may not even be
completely sure of what you want, but I bet you’ll get a reward you didn’t
know you were looking for. Cagey innocence and high expectations will be
your secret weapons. Dumb luck and crazy coincidences will be your X-
factors. Here’s one of your main tasks: As the unreasonable blessings flow
in your direction, don’t disrupt or obstruct the flow.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): As soon as a baby loggerhead turtle leaves its
nest on a Florida beach, it heads for the ocean. It’s only two inches long.
Although it can swim just one mile every two hours, it begins an 8,000-
mile journey that takes ten years. It travels east to Africa, then turns
around and circles back to where it originated. Along the way it grows big
and strong as it eats a wide variety of food, from corals to sea cucumbers
to squid. Succeeding at such an epic journey requires a stellar sense of
direction and a prodigious will to thrive. I nominate the loggerhead turtle
to be your power animal for the coming weeks, Cancerian.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In 1961, 19-year-old Bob Dylan began doing solo
performances of folk songs at New York clubs. To accompany his vocals,
he played an acoustic guitar and harmonica. By 1963, his career had
skyrocketed. Critics called him a creative genius. Pop stars were recording
the songs he wrote, making him rich. But he still kept his instrumentation
simple, relying entirely on his acoustic guitar and harmonica. That
changed in 1965, when he made the leap to rock and roll. For the first
time, his music featured a full drum set and electric guitar, bass, and
keyboards. Some of his fans were offended. How dare he renounce his
folk roots? I wonder if it might be time for you to consider a comparable
transition, Leo. Are you willing to risk disorienting or disturbing those who
would prefer you to stay as you are?
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Whoever travels without a guide needs 200
years for a two-day journey.” That’s an old Sufi saying sometimes
attributed to the poet Rumi. I don’t think it’s accurate in all cases.
Sometimes we are drawn to wander into frontiers that few people have
visited and none have mastered. There are no guides! On other occasions,
we can’t get the fullness of our learning experience unless we are free to
stumble and bumble all by ourselves. A knowledgeable helper would only
interfere with that odd magic. But right now, Virgo, I believe the Sufi
saying holds true for you. Where you’re headed, you would benefit from
an advisor, teacher, or role model.
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): There’s a meme rolling around Tumblr and
Facebook that goes like this: “Everyone wants a magical solution for their
problems, but they refuse to believe in magic.” Judging from the
astrological omens, I think this Internet folk wisdom applies to your
current situation. As I see it, you have two choices. If you intend to keep
fantasizing about finding a magical solution, you will have to work harder
to believe in magic. But if you can’t finagle your brain into actually
believing in magic, you should stop fantasizing about a magical solution.
Which will it be?
SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): I have taken a passage from a letter that
Henry Miller wrote to Anais Nin, and I have chopped it up and rearranged
it and added to it so as to create an oracle that’s perfect for you right
now. Ready? “This is the wild dream: you with your chameleon’s soul
being anchored always in no matter what storm, sensing you are at home
wherever you are. You asserting yourself, getting the rich varied life you
desire; and the more you assert yourself, the more you love going deeper,
thicker, fuller. Resurrection after resurrection: that’s your gift, your
promise. The insatiable delight of constant change.”
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): One of your important assignments in
the coming week is to get high without the use of drugs and alcohol. Let
me elaborate. In my oracular opinion, you simply must escape the
numbing trance of the daily rhythm. Experiencing altered states of
awareness will provide you with crucial benefits. At the same time, you
can’t afford to risk hurting yourself, and it’s essential to avoid stupidly
excessive behavior that has negative repercussions. So what do you
think? Do you have any methods to get sozzled and squiffed or jiggled
and jingled that will also keep you sane and healthy?
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Singer Gloria Gaynor recorded the song “I
Will Survive” in 1978. It sold over two million copies and ultimately
became an iconic disco anthem. And yet it was originally the B-side of
“Substitute,” the song that Gaynor’s record company released as her
main offering. Luckily, radio DJs ignored “Substitute” and played the hell
out of “I Will Survive,” making it a global hit. I foresee the possibility of a
similar development for you, Capricorn. What you currently consider to be
secondary should perhaps be primary. A gift or creation or skill you think
is less important could turn out to be pre-eminent.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I’m tempted to furrow my brow and raise
my voice as I tell you to please please please go out and do the dicey task
you’ve been postponing. But that would just be a way to vent my
frustration, and probably not helpful or constructive for you. So here’s my
wiser advice: To prepare for that dicey task, lock yourself in your
sanctuary until you figure out what you first need to change about
yourself before you can accomplish the dicey task. I think that once you
make the inner shift, doing the deed will be pretty easy.


Homework: If you could be any other sign besides the one you actually
are, what would it be, and why? 


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